We had a conversation and I think it went well. We decided not to date anymore, which is sort of interesting since we never really started. We had a conversation about breaking up, despite the fact that we weren't ever actually together. We were rational, sweet to one another and everything that you could hope from a person when you imagine breaking up, except we weren't technically dating to begin with...not really...
We spent time together and agreed early on not to get too involved, which lead to spending more time together and another conversation about how our situations weren't right for one another. Then we had yet another conversation based around the possibility that I was going to move and I got the sweetest note anyone's ever written to me:
“… even though you haven’t made a decision, I think we both know the facts and that on paper, the smart thing to do is not what your heart thinks is good for you. And even if you leave, I’ll still love you. And when you come back, I’ll welcome you. And we’ll go to Flanagan’s. And to Buffa’s. And to Yo’ Mama’s. Just like we always did. We’ll make stupid jokes and I’ll sneak glitter into your suitcase. I’ll fall asleep in your lap… the next time you come back we’ll do it all over again.
You know, just in case you were wondering what would happen if you left. “
It's a lot of work staying together when you aren't together. It's also challenging to break up with someone that you aren't dating. We knew better to begin with, but we did anyway (I'm not sorry for it), so we say goodbye and tell each other we can only just be friends. We meet each other for coffee and look each other in the eyes, speak calmly about the fact that it's over even though it never started and then she follows me home and we lay on the couch talking until she has to leave for work. We promise to be friends and then we kiss each other on the lips (but chastely) before she climbs into her car and drives away.
So it's over before it began, but it sure was good while it wasn't.
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